‘Tis the season to be jolly.
Unfortunately, that is not always the case for many people. As the holiday approaches, many people become anxious, experience sadness or even depression. Some refer to it as the holiday blues.
It’s hard to imagine someone is blue while you are out enjoying all the parties, festive bright lights, and decorations.
Why is it so many people have a hard time during this joyful season?
We often overlook traditions as being a contributing factor to the holiday blues. Why? Because even after life situations change, people cling to the old way of celebrating. This attempt to hang onto old patterns tends to bring you down when you realize; it’s just not the same.
Holiday Blues and Traditions
There are many benefits to creating and maintaining holiday traditions for your family. Passing down traditions provides a sense of identity and stability.
They can also bring fun, familiarity, and comfort to family members. Particularly children who look forward to yearly traditions like cutting down the Christmas tree.
But when life situations change, there can be a downside to traditions.
When kids grow up and move away, or there is a death or divorce, things change. Now those happy traditions bring to light deficiencies or a lack in your life which is not very jolly.
So, maybe it’s time for a change.
You can cherish the old traditions in your memory, but maybe its time to create new ones. Creating new ways to celebrate the holidays can be fun! And if you create them to suit your current situation, it will help bring back the joy of the holiday.
Maybe It’s Time for Change
Traditions are just another way of saying there are patterns of doing certain things in your life. When they serve you, these patterns can be helpful.
Think of the first time you tried to walk. It took so much concentration. But after repeating it over and over and creating a pattern of taking steps, it became second nature.
Patterns help you feel comfortable with what you are doing. If every time you did something that felt new and different, it would be taxing and unsettling. You don’t always want to be learning new ways of doing things. However, sometimes these life patterns are created without us realizing the grip they have on our emotions.
It’s like going against a strong current. When a pattern is set in a life situation, trying to change that pattern can disrupt your energy and feel disconcerting.
For instance, from a young age, you learn that you need to brush your teeth when awakening and just before you go to bed. Otherwise, you will get cavities, and your teeth will fall out. If someone told you that wasn’t the case, that you never had to brush your teeth again, would you believe them? Most likely not. You have set a pattern of doing something that is very hard to change. You would feel if you didn’t brush your teeth every day, you were ruining them. So this pattern serves you well.
But sometimes the patterns in your life no longer serve you or bring you joy. That is when it might be time for a change.
But no worries. You are used to life changes. We change our life patterns all the time without even thinking about it.
Remember those significant life changes like when you first went to school, began your new career, got married, had kids, or become empty nesters. These are all life changing times because new patterns were created.
Creating New Patterns
Often people don’t think of the holiday as a time when patterns may need to be changed. We have it stuck in our head that holidays revolve around traditions.
So if you are struggling with the holiday this year, maybe it is time to change your patterns or ways of doing things. There are many ways you can create new patterns by trying new traditions.
If you no longer have anyone to buy for, but love holiday shopping, find a family in need. Reach out to a local charity to connect you with families that might not have the means to buy gifts. Buy presents for them!
Have your kids grown up and moved away? Invite your friends and neighbors over to bake those holiday cookies. Let them take cookies home to their families. You’ll enjoy it as much as you did when you made them with your children.
If you loved going to holiday parties, find a local holiday festival in a nearby town to enjoy. You will find they have the same festive atmosphere as those parties.
When my kids were younger, our celebration included all our aunts, uncles, and cousins. We had a house full of people during the holiday. But as my kids grew up, we no longer all got together.
So the first year my immediate family wanted to fill that void, we started a new tradition. We picked names from a hat for each other and kept it a secret. Then we all went together to a Target store and bought a small gift for that person. We had fun avoiding each other in the store since we didn’t want to ruin the surprise.
Later that evening, we sat around and opened the gifts we had purchased. Such a simple tradition. But now we all love it and look forward to it each year. We never look back at those times when the house was full of people and festivities.
So this year, if you are struggling because you are focusing on what is no longer there, make a change. Create new traditions and bring joy back to your holiday. Don’t let the holiday blues bring you down!
In truth, love, and healing,
Peace and be well,
Founder of Maty’s Healthy Products — a line of natural & organic health products made from whole food ingredients
Carolyn Harrington