Are you ready to take your relationship to the next level? If so, then continue reading.
I was recently in a live Q&A on Instagram with MyDomaine.com. I was asked all sorts of interesting questions about relationships and I had the opportunity to answer them. I am not a relational expert, but I am an energy healing expert. So my answers are from the perspective of following the energy. Here are some of the more interesting feeds.
Q: Do you think there is a way to attract your ‘other half’ into your life, or is it a matter of fate? I’m asking because it seems like I’m failing at this. I’ve never had a serious relationship that could end up in something like marriage. And it’s scary considering that the majority of my friends are already married and have kids. Do you think there is a way to change this situation?
A: That is an excellent question. There is a way to attract your other half into your life. It is a complex issue though because, from an energy standpoint, there are many reasons why you may not be attracting the one who will bring you joy. Here are a few reasons and what you can do about them.
1. The timing is just not right. In which case, sit tight and let it happen. Keep enjoying life. When you are happy, you attract happy things. Be sure not to worry or be afraid you will not find your soulmate. If you start down that road of worry and fear, you will repel any relationship from coming into your life. Keep believing it will happen at the right time.
2. You are blocked from having a meaningful relationship. These blocks can occur for numerous reasons, some of which you may not even be aware of if it stems from an early childhood situation. When an event takes place in our life that leaves an emotional scar, we sometimes put an energetic shield up to protect us from additional scars. These guards are called heart walls. A heart wall is good at first because it protects you from getting hurt again. Putting up a wall allows you to move on in life. But when that heart wall remains and is no longer needed, then it can prevent a new relationship from blossoming. There are many ways to remove a heart wall. One of the easiest methods is to try Tapping. There are numerous YouTube videos to watch about relationships and bringing them into your life. You might want to begin there. You can also seek out a good, intuitive Tapping practitioner that can help you better locate those blocks.
3. There is a lesson to learn in all this. Sometimes when something keeps happening to you, your higher self is trying to illuminate a life lesson. Take a step back and think if you can find meaning in all this. Is there something you need to learn? It could be as simple as learning to put yourself first. I don’t know; it could be anything. But once you realize what the lesson is, the problem just drifts away.
4. If you don’t think you are blocked, I wrote a blog post about attracting more love into your life. It gives practical ways to bring your soulmate into your life.
Q: My partner is further along in his career and is more successful than me. He also makes more money than I do and therefore contributes more to the household finances. I’m just starting my career and recently made a job change. Although the new job pays more, I’m still not making nearly as much as him. I’m worried that I will never catch up. How do I stop feeling inadequate and insecure about my contributions to the relationship?
A: I would ask why you feel you need to “catch up.” You both have unique gifts and qualities that support your relationship together. He just may be more financial in nature. Find where your gifts are that add value to the relationship. Maybe you are meant to bring levity and fun to both your lives. That’s important too! Otherwise, I think Tapping or EFT would be a great healing technique that can change your perception of the situation because that is all it is, a perception. Good Luck!
Q: How do I get it across to my partner that my feelings and emotions need to be respected? I’ve told her verbally, but she doesn’t seem to understand. It’s not her fault; she just doesn’t know how. I appear to need affirmations. It depends on how my partner reacts to my words, needs, and wishes is when I get hurt. I feel ignored, and it makes me angry and frustrated. I want us to be supportive of each other while making sure we don’t sway away from our personal growth.
A: Have you ever seen the book, Love Languages? It might be good for the two of you to read it to see how two people who speak different love languages can move forward and thrive. Another thing I would suggest is for you to take a step back as if you were an outsider looking in. Try to find a lesson to learn. At times when a problem is persistent, and won’t go away, your higher self is trying to get your attention to give you a life lesson. For instance, if you keep having the same argument over and over again, maybe there is something in you that needs to change a perception. Life lessons are interesting. Until we learn the lesson, it will keep presenting itself. Once you realize what it is, the problem just dissipates and dissolve.
To strengthen the bond between you and your partner, try this energy healing exercise for a deeper love connection.
Q: How does one stay present and make space for a new chapter: life, love, work? Without feeling guilty of leaving less nurturing friends and family behind? Staying centered and activating new mindsets so to speak.
A: First, you must realize that change is good. And with change comes new friends, new relationships, and new and exciting things. Stay focused on that and let things that no longer serve you drift away. Remember, one door may need to close before a new one opens. Spend time with yourself and think of all the good things that will come.
From an energy standpoint, when change happens, it is because you no longer resonate with the old way of doing things. Your energy is changing which means your vibrations are changing. When your vibrations change, you resonate with other like vibrations. When this happens, you attract different things into your life. If the change is good, then your vibrations are reflecting that and attracting better things into your life. Let the new things come into your life and let the old fade away. It is hard at first, but when you become comfortable with the new vibrations, everything falls into place nicely.
Q: How can you let go of the past? Even when you’re in a long-term relationship, sometimes those old issues come back to haunt you and fill you with doubt.
A: Great question! Letting go of the past is a very common problem people go through. There are many ways to release negative energy and emotions that are attached to people/events. Here are a few of my favorite ways.
1. Tapping is one of my favorites because it is so easy to do. There are so many YouTube videos that demonstrate this practice. If you want it to be effective, seek out a Tapping practitioner. They can help by getting to the root of what is causing the problem which makes it more effective.
2. Bach Flower Therapy is another method to try. This therapy is a subtle way to change your perception of the situation. It won’t modify the situation; it just changes your perception. But when your attitude changes, it opens up new ideas that lead to resolving the situation.
3. Affirmations are another good way to stay focused on letting go of the past. By repeating them each day, you begin a pattern of letting go of what no longer serves you and accepting of anything new. Here is an example of a great affirmation to say for this situation: “I look with wonder at that which is before me.” Or another one to say, “I banish the past and now live in the wonderful now, where happy surprises come to me each day.”
Q: My significant other is going through an incredibly tumultuous couple of months and is on the cusp of accomplishing incredible things. But sometimes he gets caught up in the day-to-day and feels overwhelmed by stress. How can I be the best support to him while working long hours and not being physically present?
A: By sending your partner positive thoughts. When you envision your partner surrounded by the white light of protection, you are giving him an energetic boost that can help in this situation. Keep your thoughts positive and bring levity to the situation. Your thoughts affect your partners as much as their thoughts. Don’t bring them down with worry or negative thinking. By sending positive and loving thoughts, you help them. Visualizing them being peaceful will give more support than you think. It is so powerful and can make a huge difference!
Another thing to try would be to convince them to take a moment and practice mindfulness. Letting your mind relax and focusing on yourself can give you that energetic boost.
Q: My partner is on the verge of having everything set up for his life, but too much pressure and stress is causing him to lose a grip on his anger. I am on the similar cusp of starting my academic career, so we are both touchy about things. Plus the stress is causing us both hurt. How can we be each other’s support systems while at the same time renew our focus on our individual growth?
A: For personal growth, I wholly believe in taking time at the start of each day to feel gratitude and then focus in on what your goals are. By taking 10-15 minutes each day to hone in on the good in your life and then what you want, you make it a priority. List things you are grateful for each day in a journal. Then list five things you intend to do. This practice will start a pattern of getting in the right frame of mind from the get go. It makes your life easier and keeps you happier. Try it; I think you will be surprised at the results.
There is also Bach Flowers to help with negative emotions that arise, so you can squelch them right before they cause real problems in your life.
Q: Do you believe in the “right” timing? Is there the potential for love between two people in the future if now isn’t the right time?
A: Absolutely! The universe works in perfect timing. Trust it. Just because it’s not happening right now, doesn’t mean it won’t occur in the future.
Q: I am 36, and the last three jobs I have had have ended in liquidation for the companies. I feel like I am in a bad cycle and I am trying to stay positive, but it is so hard. My partner is very supportive, and I am a positive person but lately I have been feeling very down. Can you suggest anything that may help? I am thankful for what I have, and I am out there every day looking for a new employment position! Can you help?
A: Yes. There are patterns that we create in our lives without even knowing it. This pattern you are experiencing might have even started at a very young age. For instance, maybe you lost something of value to you as a child, and that energy is still with you, so you are still in that pattern of losing things. Tapping or EFT, is an excellent way to shift your thoughts regarding this pattern. I would suggest finding a practitioner who is good at seeing life situational patterns. Sometimes they are hard to find on your own.
Q: What is the best way to prep for love? Or how do I change the vibe being sent out that attracts the wrong person?
A: Find something you take an interest in and share your enthusiasm for it. Others will take notice and be attracted to you. Then, shift your expectations. When you do this, you change your conditions. (Example: If you cannot imagine love happening to you, a habit begins to form, you develop a pattern of waiting for the lack of love.) When you begin to act as if you expect happiness and greater love, it will come.
If you didn’t find the answer, you were looking for about your relationship, leave a comment below with your question! I will try my best to answer it.
Peace and be well,
Founder of Maty’s Healthy Products — a line of natural & organic health products made from whole food ingredients
Carolyn Harrington